Several Ways to Annoy a Prince andor Warlock
by EosAella
Summary: A series of one-shots inspired by MerlinFanNumber1's lists of ways to annoy Arthur and Merlin. Chapter 2: Tell Arthur he's one an award for 'Prince of the Month'
1. Chapter 1

**So here it is! The first one-shot of many (I hope). First massive thanks to MerlinFanNumber1 for letting me do this because it's her lists that inspired this (if you haven't already go check them out '50 ways to annoy...") so all due credit to her for the basic idea behind each one. Now without further ado, on with story!**

* * *

><p><em>50 ways to annoy Arthur Pendragon<em>

_#1 Ask him to pout_

* * *

><p>"I just don't know how to convince him!" Arthur threw his hands in the air in exasperation.<p>

There had been reports of a group of sorcerers roaming the forest - so naturally Uther was on a rampage having worked himself into his custom 'magic frenzy' as Merlin had so nick-named it. Arthur had, of course, volunteered himself for the job but had been told in no uncertain terms was he to go.

There was a valid reason for this being that he had recently suffered an injury whilst on patrol and could now barely lift a sword in order to fight his way out of a wet paper bag (he had a fractured wrist) but of course this didn't stop the young prince.

"Well you are injured..." Merlin pointed out and then ducked quickly to avoid the oncoming goblet. When he stood again he noticed Arthur gently cradling his wrist, the effort of throwing something having been too much.

He pointedly raised his eyebrows - a trick learnt from Gaius.

"I am not injured!"

"Arthur. I could beat you in a fight at the moment." Merlin put his hands on his hips.

"I doubt that."

"You just injured yourself throwing a goblet!"

"Yeah... Well... Shh."

Merlin rolled his eyes and began collecting parts of Arthur's armour from where it had scattered to the four corners of the earth (or so it seemed).

"I'm going to go talk to my father again."

"You know if it doesn't work," Merlin shouted and Arthur turned back, "You could always do the pouty thing you do."

"MERLIN! I am a prince, princes do not pout."

"Ahh," Merlin nodded in agreement, "But you are also a prat, and prats do pout."

Arthur went to pick something up to throw before realising he couldn't with a painful twinge of his wrist. He let out an annoyed noise before storming from the room slamming the door behind him.

Merlin smiled to himself.

"I expect my armour polished and my stables mucked out by dinner!"

Merlin stopped smiling.


	2. Chapter 2

**Once again, credit to MerlinFanNumber1 for the idea behind the story :)**

* * *

><p><em>50 ways to annoy Arthur Pendragon<em>

_#4 Tell him he's won an award for 'Prince of the Month'_

* * *

><p>"Sire!" Arthur turned at the sound of someone calling to him, he saw a small serving boy running towards him.<p>

"Yes?"

"I was told to errm... That is to say you need to... Um... Well..."

"Is this going anywhere?" Arthur asked crossing his arms, he was paused outside his chambers and wanted nothing more than to go and relax in a hot bath after a long day of training.

"Well that is to say that..."

"Arthur!" Merlin's head popped out of the door to the Prince's chambers. "You can't come in."

"And why not?"

"Because..." Merlin wracked his brains, Leon was meant to be handling excuses! "There's an infestation."

"An infestation?"

"Yes. Cockroaches! Big hairy ones, the smallest are about the size of your fist, the biggest are about that size of your ego."

"MERlin." There was a momentary pause, "How can cockroaches be hairy?"

"I don't know! I'm not about to go and ask them!"

"Well can I at least have a bath?"

"No."

"If I order you to let me in will you move?"

"No."

"Do you know his name?" Arthur jerked his head towards the serving boy next to him.

"Yes."

"What is it?"

"Ni."

"Merlin! What have I told you about using such language?"

"But his name is Ni..."

"My father was a fan of the knights who said ecky-ecky-ecky-ecky-pikang-zoop-boing-goodem-zoo-owli-zhiv."

"That's a bit of a mouthful."

"Yes sire. They were also known as the knights who up until recently said ni!"

"Well that makes more sense."

"Well it did, until several years passed and them saying Ni was no longer a recent thing. Then it just became downright confusing."

"I can imagine."

There was a pause.

"So am I allowed in yet Merlin?"

"No."

Arthur sighed and walked off back down the corridor. All these servants were acting very weird today.

\('0')/

Arthur was just walking past the stables when he heard a commotion inside. He looked in to find his trusty mare whinnying - obviously having been spooked by something - and the stable boy no where to be found.

He entered with the idea of calming the horse but as soon as he got close she turned her head and Arthur was clobbered round the face by the creature's immense jaw.

He fell to the ground and the missing stable boy rushed in to find a now rather sheepish looking horse (which was strange enough in itself) and a very irritated prince on the floor with hair full of... Well we won't go into that. He also noticed that the young royal seemed to have a growing bruise down one side of his face.

Arthur stood and just glowered at the boy before sweeping from the stables. He ignored the odd looks he got from passers by and strode straight back to the castle where he burst into his chambers not caring what Merlin had said.

"CONGRATULATIONS!" The people in the room yelled as he entered.

There was a deathly silence as everyone actually saw their prince.

Above their heads was a banner reading 'Prince of the Month' unfortunately it was pretty obvious that the word prat had been hastily scribbled out and replaced with prince.

"Arthur," Gwaine stepped forward, "You've got a little something in your..." He trailed off and gestured to his own head of hair.

"MERLIN!"


End file.
